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Tuesday, 27 May 2008 ♥ Tuesday, May 27, 2008                       After all this thinkin and everything we've been through. 25 may 2008.. u wanted it all to end. ur reasons wasnt fair for me. but u still wanted it to end.. there's nothing i could do or say to change ur mind. and now i realise that when a guy say they want it to be over.. they REALLY want it to end. and its pointless for s girls to beg and plead. i felt soo dumb.. You convince me soo much how much this love we had would last.. but time has made u a whole new someone. u were never the same again. and now....just like that it has ended.. this heart shatters to know that there's no more you. why ashri???why??? what wrong hav i done to you that u left me this way.. i feel so low of myself. i feel sooo wrong in every relationship. and now you prove me how much a failure i am in relationship.. Cried all nite for you... but i noe these tears will never bring u back.. This morning..went to school with a really SWOLLEN eyes. i had a hard time sleeping. reading through all his messages from the day we ferst met till it ended. thinkin of all the happy memories and the sad moments. tears keep dripping down soo much.. looking through ur pictures make me misses u sooo much.. i just wanted to feel u next to me like the old times. i just want you..........!!!!!!!!!!!! why did you go at the time i really need you??????? didnt concentrate my o level malay just now. was thinkin and cryin while doin the papers. didnt eat anything at all fer break time. just sat and cry sooo mcuh.. i'm glad to hav frenz who really cared.. thanx Atin.Fayyad.Fattah.Man.Zalikha.Nadz. and to Dinah...thanx fer talking to me last nite.. and also ZHI NIAN... you hav tried cheerin me up too. thanx fer talking to me on the phone consoling me. also Paul.Yasin. all of you tried telling me to be strong. i'm glad to hav frenz like all of you.. still...i wasnt strong to face this.. art was alrite..manage to finish up most of the instructions.. and my gals make me laugh alot.. but deep now i noe i'm trying to fight this pain. and sooo after art went home to change.. Met Zhi Nian..went to eat...thanx to him i actually eat. then head to merlion. sit at starbuckz. then to raffles bridge...trying to console me..then listen to sad songs.. snap photos.. cheering me up all...i do feel better somehow. headed home at 11 plus. walking home alone crying thinkin of him. remembering how he used to send me home. he was such a nice guy.. a guy that i had wish for...but now... haiz..... the whole day i keep thinkin... Does he feel regret after leaving me?? does he think of me like i'm thinkin of him rite now?? can he sleep well each nite?? can he even eat without thinkin of me?? does he feels what i'm feeling rite now?? does he think of all the moment spend?? does he still need me like i needed him??? love me the way he used to...?? does he even care about me rite now at this very moment. i feel so sad to think about what he always say.. never to leave him... and i never did.. every message he would say :Remember that i love you tau. i swear i'll never leave you.ingat tau.i tkkan pernah tinggalkan you.. but why did he??? oh god...i really miss him.... i'm soo hopeless now.. ASHRI!!! i need you badly!!!!!! =( Whenever I cried he would always make me feel like he would change the world if he could so it couldn't hurt me anymore. But now I’m crying and he's not here There's this place in me where your finger prints still rest... your kisses still linger and your whispers softly echo... It's the place where a part of you will forever be a part of me Knowing that I will have you makes me glad; losing you will surely make me sad. I know you don’t need me bad nor do I want you bad it's just that your the BEST I ever had... If ever things would change and your love would fade, I’d still not break the promise I made. if you let go I’ll accept and there's nothing I can do but I’ll be there and still love you... Trouble is a part of your life, and if you don't share it, you don't give the person that loves you enough chance to love you enough. |
colourful 
she's already sweet seventeen. A Dorky bitch. Chocolates is her addictions. she's a Shopping freakz. Extrovert characteristic. Always a Bookworm -_- STARBUCKZ Lover. And.. She Loves her BF ZHI NIAN<3 He is her everything. The one her heart yearns for all this time.
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